justin at thirteen

for hours i lie awake
fascinated by you my
son snoring slightly
like an old movie
projector
across the room
in my mind you are
instantly twelve
eleven eight seven six
five four three
two years old again
then the baby with such
serious eyes sometimes
slightly snoring your
head in my left hand your
limbs dangling from my
arm swaying in rhythm as
i breeze about the house
so many things i want
to say so many thoughts all
crashing in like hitchcocks
birds such relentless
things reluctant lessons
i like to think that
i have learned

and all of this just to say

learn all you can learn
about something and still
love it or be prepared
to lose it

(2003)

Jeffrey Spahr-Summers